It's 2011-where does the time go?

Hello followers!

Well, it's been a while, I admit. Life has a nasty way of interfering, and this past year life has been most intrusive, I'm afraid.

I've been wondering what is happening to the world around me. Apparently people have begun to go insane, and I'm really trying to piece together exactly when that started. Apparently it's not enough to disagree with people, we now have to resort to name calling, character attacks, and calls for violence. Violence? Because we disagree? It just makes me sad.

Another thing that makes me sad is the economy and how the politicians in charge are trying to fix it. Our economy tanked because of greed, namely the greed of the people who control most of the wealth in the country. Now those are the people who are trying to blame public employees and union members for the problems and steal, once again, from those they stole from in the first place. Does no one see the hypocrasy? Really, people, unions aren't the problem, the greedy fat cats are the problem, and if you let them win, conditions for all workers are going to deteriorate so drastically that we will be in danger of becoming a third world country. The middle class is being assaulted from all sides and I'm fearful of the implications.

But let's not dwell on the negatives; there are some good things to think about as well. I have some remarkable students this year; kids I really like and who seem to care about actually learning something. It makes it easier to go to work when there is something good happening there. Oh sure, there are those who are disengaged and really difficult to motivate, but even some of them have begun to come around, and that really made this week a lot better. I actually had two students ask for extra help before HSPAs. In the beginning of the year they were disinterested and unmotivated. They're showing improvement now, and asking for help. I think that pretty much made my week.

My husband makes my week too. No matter what else is going on in the world, when we're home together it's like everything else fades away. Having a strong relationship when everything around you is falling apart goes a long way towards keeping it all together. I heartily endorse finding someone who can share in your interests, keep you laughing, and suport you no matter what you are doing. So glad I found him.

I'm not going to promise regular updates here, but I will be back, and hopefully with more upbeat posts. Lord, I need a vacation!!

Watching TV

My spouse and I were watching the final episode of FlashForward this evening. We know it's cancelled, we get why, but we'd watched the whole series so we figured we might as well stick around for the last episode. Somewhere around the last 30 seconds, our DVR tuned in to another channel to record something we'd programmed in, so we missed the final events. We looked at one another for a second and then he said, "I'm sure someone will tell me how it ended." I replied, barely looking up from my computer, "Just Hulu it." Then it dawned on me that television viewing has changed in ways we never could have imagined, and will never be the same.

When I was a child, television was in its infancy, and tv shows were events. Series television was a one shot deal; you caught it or you didn't, and if you didn't you hoped to see it in summer reruns. There was no way to record it, no way to see it again if you really liked it. Good shows or good episodes lived on only in memory, and in the resulting discussions about them. Later, syndication revived some of the more popular shows, and if your favorite was a hit show, you could watch them in syndication. Ad infinitum. The Honeymooners played in syndication for years; I Married Joan not so much.

Movies on television were my favorite. Each week, when the TV Guide came, I would flip to the back to see what movies were playing that week, excited if I found one of my favorites. I scanned quickly for a well-loved horror movie, or one of my cherised Bette Davis movies. It was such a treat. I learned the fine art of synopsis from those TV Guides too. The one or two sentences next to each movie title gave me enough information to know whether or not I'd be tuning in, and a little of what I could expect. Kids today don't have this valuable resource at their disposal anymore. I guess that's why, when I ask them to give me a brief synopsis, I get the whole story. They just don't have the skill.

There are a couple of movie shows that I recall lovingly from my past. Channel 7's 4:30 movie, on every afternoon at...wait for it...4:30. The Early Show, whose theme song,o "The Syncopated Clock" played while the screen showed a clock in a bell jar, came on at 8:00 pm on some local channel. There was the Late Show (with the same theme song as The Early Show) and it's followup, The Late Late Show (hey, I didn't say they were imaginative) which would be over somewhere around 3 am. And the piece de resistance, The Million Dollar Movie, on Channel 9. That was the best, cause they'd show the same movie all week, and all day on Sunday. I watched Rodan eight times in one week, and cried every time they killed the monster.

The Channel 7 4:30 movie would have theme weeks. Western, Love Stories, Horror and Science Fiction. I really looked forward to the Horror weeks, and the Sci Fi as well. Great old cheesy movies like The H Man or The Giant Behemoth would keep me out of my mom's hair while she cooked dinner. I loved those afternoons.

The real events were the big movie releases to television. Saturday Night at the Movies was the show that would hook you up with the most recent movies to television, and it was a big deal when they'd announce their fall schedule. Sometimes, a big movie was such a big deal that people would gather at someone's house to have a viewing party. We looked forward to those shows, and celebrated those television releases just as much as if we were attending a Hollywood premiere.

Television has become something entirely different now. We record; we DVR, we Tivo, we Hulu. Television is at our disposal now, not something we must rearrange our schedules for. The technology finally works for us.

Except this Sunday.

This coming Sunday is the series finale for Lost, and it feels like those old Saturday Night at the Movies days all over again. People are buzzing; parties are being planned. My husband has already suggested we call for a pizza so I don't have to cook. Once again, if only for one night, television will be an event, and the kids will understand its power.

I can't wait.

When did I become the bad guy?

I haven't written in a while. I'll confess, the current situation has me paralyzed; I cannot write well because when I try I get sick to my stomach. I and those who share my profession have become public enemy number one and I am positively heartbroken at the polarization of the population. I am not going into detail here because I cannot. I'm afraid that I'm three years from retirement and I'm going to lose a majority of my pension through animosity and ignorance. I am not going to get rich on my pension; indeed I was already planning on working part time after retirement simply to pay my bills and buy food. How can people begrudge me so little when I've spent a career helping them and their children become qualified to have their own careers? I don't understand the world anymore, and it makes me sad.

Finding one's self

Yesterday some friends and I went to the Grounds for Sculpture in Trenton. I'd never been there before and wasn't sure what to expect. I figured there'd be art and nature. What I didn't figure on was that there'd be me.

When we got to the park I couldn't wait to walk around and immerse myself in the sculptures. What was really cool was that there were sculptures in and around the town itself, so you could see some art on your way to the grounds. I wish I'd been able to take more pictures of those pieces, but apparently I suck at taking pictures from a moving car. Actually, I'm a terrible photographer anyway, but having to hit a moving target was really a rough job. I didn't do well.

Anyway, once we got into the park I found plenty to photograph. It was a beautiful day and the walking was nice, even if it was a little hot. Just exploring an outdoor museum on a gorgeous day was a wonderful stress releaser. We walked, we laughed, and we had a great time. Finally, some time after lunch, we found a little table in the shade of a stand of bamboo and sat for hours, talking, laughing, and sharing a fine mood with everyone who passed by. And the people who passed by were all so friendly and willing to stop and chat for a few seconds. I think I'm still kind of high on that good feeling today, because I just feel so at peace.

Now I think I need to go back in the summer when the leaves will be on the trees and the park will be in full bloom. It was pretty yesterday, but should be glorious then.

Another thing I never expected was the peacocks. Not that I'm surprised by peacocks or anything, I just didn't know they had them. So many of them. And that peacocks make a sound that sounds like a cat in heat. A really loud cat in heat. I would think that if I heard that sound late at night I'd be nervous.

So now I must check out mapquest to get the directions. I want to go back.

Easter 2010

Happy Easter!

Well, here we are on the verge of true spring, and the world came back to life like Christ in the cave. Tim and I went to the boardwalk today, an Easter tradition I haven't observed since I was fifteen. That's a really long time ago. The weather was beautiful and after the winter we've had here in the Garden State, I think everyone was ridding themselves of the cabin fever that blizzards can bring about. What I noticed, though, that even though the boardwalk was packed, people were happy and smiling. There weren't too many kids putting up a fuss, and everyone just seemed at peace. The salt air will do that to you. I'll bet those kids slept really well tonight too.

Tim and I played our first miniature golf game today too. It was pleasant and we enjoyed each other's company while battling the hills and valleys of the standard miniature golf course. Mini golf is a relaxing pursuit; it's not REAL golf, so the stress level isn't there. It's just a nice way to spend some time (and 18 bucks-yikes!) and enjoy looking awkward while you hope for the freak hole-in-one to boost your score. This particular course has "caves" to get you out of the sun for a while, and Tim particularly enjoyed that aspect of the course. He's fairer than I, and shuns the sun at every opportunity. The caves are his favorite part of this course.

All in all, the boardwalk was relaxing and a fine way to spend this sunny Easter Sunday. Being there always makes me happy and content; my goal is to spend much more time there this summer, as I need all the spiritual restoration the beach affords me.

Bring on summer!

Spring break has always been a time of purgation for me. It’s the time when I switch my seasonal clothes and start trying things on. Last year I had to buy new clothes because nothing fit; things were all too small. This year, I was glad I saved those smaller clothes. Once again, most of the clothes I wore last year didn’t fit, but this time it was because they were too large. It’s a nice feeling.


So along with purging my wardrobe I’ve been trying to purge the crap that has accumulated around my house. My problem is in deciding where to keep the stuff I actually want. Right now, my dining room table is cluttered with all sorts of miscellaneous…er…crap…and I’m here writing this blog. Mostly because now I have to categorize all of it and then find a place to keep it where I’ll actually be able to find it again when I want to use it. You see, I’m a saver. See the title of my blog page for the reason. I save everything because “I can use” it. And I’m sure I could, if I could actually put my hands on it when I do need it. Therein lies the key: retrieval. It’s not just putting things away, it’s putting them away in places that make sense. I haven’t gotten that down yet, but I keep working on it. I’ll be downright dangerous if I ever get organized.

Stuff

It's been a while since my last post and tonight seemed like the opportune time to indulge in a little wordvomit. I've been unable to write recently, first because of some technology issues, and second simply because I've been stagnated by depression over the state of...well, my state.

Recent developments in the NJ State House have made me feel like Public Enemy #1. Somehow, the horrendous state of the NJ economy is my fault for wanting to, oh I don't know, pay my bills, perhaps? The media has hyped up the governor's anti-teacher rhetoric so badly that I feel that I'm constantly on the defense, even when I simply go out to lunch. All around me, people are complaining about "those damn teachers" and how our union is "too strong" and we're a bad thing for this state. I'm sorry...I wasn't aware that preparing the youth of NJ for a worthwhile future was a subversive act. The idea that everyone in the state (or so it seems) begrudges me the medical benefits that saved my life, or the hard-earned pension which will still require me to work part time to pay my bills after I retire actually has made me sick to my stomach lately. Now they want me to take a wage freeze next year. I no longer get automatic raises and depend on a longevity increase every five years, with next year's to be my last. My wages have been frozen, so to speak, for the last five years. But I'm greedy; excuse me. I actually thought I was doing important work for which I should be rewarded with a fair and equitable income that would pay my bills. Silly fucking me.

Ok, rant over now. On to other stuff. Which is a nice word for me...stuff. I once directed a production of one-acts and vignettes which I billed _Stuff_, as it was really a conglomeration of various ideas and genres. It was fun, and enabled me to work with some fun kids. Stuff has always been one of my favorite words, as it is such a utilitarian word. It can do any number of jobs in the language, and yet doesn't pin one down too much. I'm fond of not being pinned down lately, since I'm really seriously considering what I'll do when I retire from teaching. With all the economic flak lately, I was afraid I'd have to put that retirement date off, but I realized that no matter what is done to my salary or pension, I really will need to retire on schedule. I've loved teaching, but really, I will need a change in three years, so June of 2013 is my target retirement date. Of course, if the business of education gets any more ridiculous, I might go out in April of that year, since that's my actual anniversary date. Guess I'll have to wait and see. So now I'm left to consider what to do with my life. I can empathize with my seniors, looking forward to a future filled with promise and the unknown. I like it! Guess it's time to think about what I want to be when I grow up.

Well, this post has been a little scattered, but that's been my state of mind for a couple of weeks now. I need this spring break, just to have some time to get my head back together. I promise my next posts will be a bit more focused.